Family means love, trust, communication, being together, sharing, understanding, listening, caring and space. My family members consist of my immediate family (my parents, 6 brothers, and 1 sister) and some extended. What makes us a whole is that we all understand what the meaning of family means to us as a family. With such a big family we all understand the roles that need to be played to achieve the meaning of family, for an example you always listen to the family members who are older than you.
As a multigenerational family there are differences in authority and responsibility. The older you are in my family the more authority and responsibility you have, but in my family you also have to earn it. The social system is very unique and similar to my families system. We as a family communicate with each other very well about different things, but there’s a stronger bond between us kids. I think it’s because were younger and we can relate with each other and we feel more comfortable talking, than we would our parents. That doesn’t mean our family bond is broken, it’s just at times we have problems with our parents or we have problem we don’t feel our parents would understand. There’s nothing wrong with building better relationships with your family members. My family is interdependent because we all depend on each other. It’s just a responsibility that we except. If one can’t do it then the next will do it and so on. If no one can do it someone will try to do it regardless if it’s important or not. My family differs from the common living space. Our bond is expressed through the meaning of family to us. We haven’t all lived in the same house together at one time, so our bond is different then the author’s. History plays a big roll in our family because you come together and share those experiences and talk about them for the rest of your lives. Those times last a lifetime and you eventually share those with your families and build of that. This is probably the biggest key to our family because we all are attached in our own ways. No one in my family means more or is more important than our parents and we all know that. How we know that is through communication and understanding. My family means the world to me, nothing else matters to me but them.
The ways we communicate with each other is mainly through talking, but at times we give each other looks that mean certain things. The looks only come in certain situations, for example if I’m in a conversation with someone and don’t want to be interrupted then a head nod sideways will let them know that now is not the time or wait till I’m done. We all know that talking is the best way to communicate but at times there might be situation’s that we can’t communicate at that particular time.
Anytime we come together is a special time because we don’t always see each other all the time. No matter if it’s only one family member to everyone we all share our experiences. That’s what brings us closer and makes us a tighter family unit. We take full advantage and opportunity we have to spend with each other regardless if one member sees another more than everyone else.
Our family system is very unique because everyone takes care of everyone in some way. Obviously my parents take care of the entire family, but in my family the oldest takes care of everyone younger and the next takes care of those who are under them and so on. Our system works well because sometimes my parents can’t be there or help out so we look to our other family members for advice or help. It just brings our family closer and closer.
Systems and interdependency are very important for studying when dealing with family communication. With systems we find out how a family brings order, how they deal with things in there lives and how a family reacts to each other and comes together. Interdependency is how a family depends on other family members within the family to do certain things and how they co-exist when asked to do those things. Both systems and interdependency go together hand in hand. Without one the other seems to be lost. It wouldn’t make since just to have systems because then you wouldn’t be able to understand how the family depends on each other and co-exist when those things come together. We are dependent on the system built for our families. When family members don’t believe in the system they are not depend on others and the system fails.
My family members are very caring and watchful. If there’s an opposing force it will be noticed and seen. We as a family then communicate it to each other or to that one person directly. We then leave it up to that family member to deal with it on there own unless asked or if it is a real serious situation. Opposing forces have no place in our family because we keep it so tight.
My brother and I always played basketball together every Saturday morning. If we didn’t go together we would meet each other there. We never missed a Saturday. That was our schedule spending time with each other every Saturday. When my brother got married I figured that Saturday’s were still our days. I was wrong; the first time he missed I was surprised and called as soon as I was done playing basketball to see what had happened and what was wrong. The change was that Saturday’s weren’t going to be us anymore. For me to hear that was devastating because I was so used to it. I eventually had to deal with it and still called on some mornings just to see if he was going to be there. It was a difficult time, but life goes on and family members move forward to start there own lives. Things like stability/change are great why’ll they last and difficult when ending. You just have to understand the situation and move forward as well. They’ll come another time when stability/change comes into your life with that same person you just have to be patient.
Tensions in families are good in constructive ways and when it comes to bringing your family members closer. Arguments are looked down upon but in fact can be very helpful to certain family members in that argument. They can let you know how you really feel and on the other hand you listen to them so that you get a clear understanding of how they feel. Tension can be good and bad it’s how you take it and understand it when you’re faced with it. You move forward or your left behind angry at the world.